Tuesday, March 14, 2006

I bet they won't be calling Randi

The Catholic Church, that harbinger of critical thought and objective reasoning, is said to be "investigating an alleged miracle that, if proven true, could be crucial in naming John Paul II a saint." Oh, how our mortal intellects can only guess at what truth will be discovered.

According to the article:
John Paul... has been credited with curing a French nun of Parkinson's disease.
Conveniently, however
The woman's name, age and place of residence have not been disclosed.
No surprises. If you read the article you'll see that we're fed the same old B.S. that we see from the Peter Popoff's and Oral Roberts's. We've got the anecdotal evidence from 'honest people', the claim that 'science can't explain it', and the media failing to pass any critical judgement. The big difference is that it's the Catholic Church, so it's dressed up in white robes, rubies, and over a thousand years of gullible credulity so that a billion people are going to believe it simply because they will have been told to.

Rest assured, the hard-nosed team conducting the investigation has no interest in pursuading you of "miracles" or "saints":
Msgr. Slawomir Oder, a Pole who is leading the case for John Paul's sainthood, said he is asking the French bishop in whose jurisdiction the alleged miracle took place to start investigating what happened.
Of course, the candidate saint performs these miracles after they die. But, of course, if a miracle happens after a pope dies, then I mean, c'mon, who else could have done it, right? I mean, the miracle practically proves itself, let's not beat around the bush here.

Here is the rigorous water-tight methodology that will be used to objectively ascertain whether or not a miracle had in fact occurred:
All of the testimony gathered will be sent to the Vatican. After that, a team of experts appointed by the Vatican's Congregation for the Causes of Saints will determine whether a miracle happened.

Something tells me that they won't be calling in James Randi to conduct the "investigation". After all, we know what he might find out, and wouldn't that upset this little pageant? Randi's still has his unclaimed million-dollar prize for anybody who can prove their claimed miracle. And, I'm guessing, with all those collection plates that get passed around on Sundays, the Catholic Church could really use a million bucks, right?

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